alrite..i'm in sch now......well..dunno....sum things happened....n i tink i cried last nite a little.....nvm....*josh* comforted mi a little....yea....mi kor....aniwae.....feelin little sick thou...dunno la....aniwae....i wonder wads goin on with life now...hmm...i'm not realli clear bout it..i dunno how to explain it..*kNoCk**kNock*...am i alive?..is this real????.....hmm....i wonder...am i livin a livin dream...i dunno..all of a sudden...i tink i'm unsure about life..i dunno..........nvm...i shant tink so much yea...i dun wanna tink n tink till i start cryin again....hmm....sumtimes i wonder......yea..ppl come to me when they're in need....i'll realli try to help them ..as much as i can...but...when i'm in trouble...who do i turn to???....sumtimes..i juz feel tt no one understands how i feel.....onli me...i dunno how comei start tinkin like tt...but...sumhow..now...i'm juz so uncertain bout myself....i mean...wads with mi?...who's cheryl??....sumtimes..i realli dunno....am i who i am???....or am i sum1 in disguise??.....i dunno....these things run thru my muind sometimes...haiz....hate myself so much sumtimes.... as in REALLI ....wished i was better off being ...den again..y did sum1 stopped mi tt nite??....if the person hadnt stopped mi....i'd be gone...there wld be peace...i mean REAL PEACE......no more Cheryl...dun hafta face a BItch like mi........everyday... 24-7 ..ya'll juz get soooo sick of her.......arh...forget it...if i shld die...i'd go wllingli.....i wldnt kill myself or wad la..i mean...*iF*....an happens la.....yea...*sIgHZ*....



left her thoughts ♥ 11:52:00 AM

k..i'm here again..yest was mi sch house openin....hmm....i went sch at 10.30.helped Mrs Chin to set up the art room thingy....till bout 12?....yea...*zion* had her graduation ceremony....haiz..look at mi...haiz...i shld be in sec 4...ah well....tink i can go sec 4 nxt yr la....i dunno....aniwae...i left sch..supposed to go fer choir..but i met *zion* in town..we ate Long Johns.......saw *sam* in town...aniwae..we alked her walked there till our legs ached...haha....we went taka...went to visit *silver* at moss...she workin there...wanted to give her a suprize..n i did..hahaha....wanted to give *kris* a surprize too..she also workin at taka..k..i did somethin sooooo stupid...hmm....i kept tinkin tt *kris* worked at nydc at taka..so mi n *zion* walked round taka tryin to look for nydc..there's no such place there...den i smsed *kris*..she said she not workin yest...n she's workin at DKNY........alrite.........i felt so dumb....ya i am la........haha....aniwae...missin her...things r goin alrite for mi n her....yea...no sweat.........



left her thoughts ♥ 3:18:00 PM

haiz...been sick these few days....haiz..yest mi temp was 39.1..scary can???....aniwae...many things happened...on 20 oct..mon....*zion* popped the question...yea..n i said yes.....yep....aniwae...yea...we're together....well.....k..my results..suckz...i failed acc..maths...tts all i noe...i dunno if i passed english...i hope i did..i also passed art...my sci...yea.i dunno!!.....i dun wanna retain again....*sObS*..i so scared..haiz..dunno wad to do......=(....*zion* came over today....but i was in bed the afternoon..den she studied.....k la...my mum gonna scream at mi..haiZ....tataz



left her thoughts ♥ 7:49:00 PM

k..i spent 5 plus hours cleanin mi room...threw away 4 big bags of stuff that has been clogin up my drawers fer the past few yrs....hmm...feel....tt i achieved soomethin..now mi room looks clean...n abit empty?????....i dunnooo...talkin to *zion*.....oh man....she's sick......noooo.....*heart painz*........haha.nvm...i'll write later..pei her talk..



left her thoughts ♥ 5:15:00 PM

alrite..i feel so energised.....nvm..aniwae...well....fri..went monks.happenin...got a BIG fight...many couples quarrelled..den fri..*Zion* n her gf broke..haiz..nvm....aniwae..yest..was out the whole day....left the house at 10 plus..al the way till 10 plus...met *zIon*....went to jurong east..played cs first...den met up with *elaine*,*cass*,*jan*,*fel lim*,*shi hui n bro*....went ice skatin....taught *zion* how to skate...*sean* was supposed to come..but she wake up late..we ton over at *sAm* house after monks....din join *clay* they all ..they ton at toa payoh..=)..aniwae....i dunno wad went on yest..felt weird...i mean...mi n *zion*...we..dunno..held hands...kinda hugged each other...so weird..but we're not together....nvm..all mi classmates taught we were..they din believe...nvm la...aniwae..they bombarded her with questions..she was so paiseh...stuck in a difficult spot..nvm......went over to *cass* house fer house warmin..*zion* came too..den later...my parents fetch her home...she cut her hair..so funni....nvm..hahaha..had fun...but i fell...mi ice hockey friend..asked him to take mi fer a speed round..i ended up fallin..so paiseh..aniwae..=)....had fun....kinda miss her....ooo...



left her thoughts ♥ 8:55:00 AM

Not Gonna Get Us

Not gonna get us
they're not gonna get us
Not gonna get us
Not gonna get us

Starting from here, let's make a promise
You and me, let's just be honest
We're gonna run, nothing can stop us
Even the night that falls all around us

Soon there will be laughter and voices
Beyond the clouds, over the mountains
We'll run away on roads that are empty
Lights from the airfield shining upon you

Nothing can stop this, not now I love you
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us
Nothing can stop this, not now I love you
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us

Not gonna get us
Not gonna get us

We'll run away, keep everything simple
Night will come down, our guardian angel
We rush adead, the crossroads are empty
Our spirits rise, they're not gonna get us

My love for you, always forever
Just you and me, all else is nothing
Not going back, not going back there
They don't understand,
They don't understand Us

Not gonna get us
Not gonna get us

Nothing can stop this, not now I love you
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us
Nothing can stop this, not now I love you
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us
They're not gonna get us



left her thoughts ♥ 5:24:00 AM

30 minutes

Mama, Papa forgive me

Out of sight, Out of mind
Out of time, To decide

Do we run?, Should I hide?
For the rest, Of My life

Can we fly?, Do I stay?
We could lose, We could fail

In the moment, It takes
To make plans, Or Mistakes

Thirty minutes, a blink of an eye
Thirty minutes, to alter our lives
Thirty minutes, to make up my mind
Thirty minutes, to finally decide

Thirty minutes, to whisper your name
Thirty minutes, to shoulder the blame
Thirty minutes, of bliss, thirty lies
Thirty minutes, to finally decide

Carousels, in the sky
That we shape, with our eyes

Under shade, silhouettes
Casting shade, Crying rain...

Can we fly? Do I stay?
We could lose, we could fail...
Either way

Options change, Chances fail
Trains derail

Thirty minutes, a blink of an eye
Thirty minutes, to alter our lives
Thirty minutes, to make up my mind
Thirty minutes, to finally decide

Thirty minutes, to whisper your name
Thirty minutes, to shoulder the blame
Thirty minutes, of bliss, thirty lies
Thirty minutes, to finally decide

To decide, to decide, to decide, to decide
to decide, to decide, to decide, to decide

To decide.



left her thoughts ♥ 5:22:00 AM

ALL THE THINGS SHE SAID


All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
This is not enough

I'm in serious s--t, I feel totally lost
If I'm asking for help it's only because
Being with you has opened my eyes
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?

I keep asking myself, wondering how
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
Nobody else so we can be free

All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
This is not enough
This is not enough

All the things she said
All the things she said

And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare - don't worry me
_Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head

Mother looking at me
Tell me what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind

Daddy looking at me
Will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line?



left her thoughts ♥ 5:21:00 AM

k....my..been so long..aniwae..lets see...yest was TUes...*zion * came over again....hmm..yea...poor..i dunno wads with ...her..k la..haf fun again..sprayed water again....edn..later..her gf called..aniwae...scolded her..hIZ..but she nv do anithin wrong wad??....nvm..i comforted her.....=)...den we playin again...she went to the bathroom to wash hands..we ended playin with the shower head..haha..so fun..den..we washed out hair.she kinda like washed mi hair.hahah...yea...den later..she had to g home..haha..aniwae...Thurs she supposed to come mi house again..den her gf wanna meet her..so.she's not comin...='(..nvm la..hope nothin goes wrong with her.....hiaz...so sad fer her...luckily i'm here fer her...i can accompany her...somtimes i wonder..Y God is like that?..as in..he lets bad things happen to good ppl..n good tings to happen to bad ppl....WADS WRONG!!!!..been pryin fer her..i cried fer her..i noe the luv pain she's goin thru.....i went thru tt before..she wanna commit suicude...i almost did tt...but..LUCKILY..i did not...n now i'm her..lookin fer better gals....=)..no matter wad hapeneds to *zion*..i will be there fer her..she's goin thru the WORST time in her life man..nvm..First love is always most painful...n unforgettable..lucky mine wasnt..hahaha.....THANK GOD i did nothin with mi first...hahaah...nvm la..but..mi first heart brk was....*Cj*..haiz...she..made mi hrt brk in to so many pieces.....nvm la.....den later got another one..i shant talk bout it..coz its not important now.i cant be bothered with it.juz onli mde mi feel tt..i BELONG TO THE LES WORLD!!..heee.....again...nvm.hahah....k la..i betta go...need to see a doc..gettin sick.....*cOuGhZ*..tataz...



left her thoughts ♥ 7:29:00 PM

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...........I SCREWED MY PAPERS!!!!!!!!!!DAMN IT!!!!!!!!I'M SO ANGRY WITH MYSELF......reached home..cried like siao.....*zion* called mi......she quickly rushed over my house......yea...aniwae....i feel so happy fer *zion*....she' n her ex patched...=)...she was pretty sad....lucky i'm here to comfort her..told her things wld be fine...n things became fine....=)....yea..i feel so lousy...i look at myself again..wondered wad haf i done....NOTHIn......I ONLI SCREWED things up...wada loser i am...*sIgH*........i dunno...aniwae.....i juz hope i dun retain again.....i dun wanna......i studied...i did...but..i'm juz so scared......haIZ............wad to do????????......cried my eyes out..wads the use??....nothin will work......wads done is done...=(...



left her thoughts ♥ 3:17:00 PM

k.......been sooooooooooo long since i last updated..alrite..nvm...well..on thurs..*zion* ..came over mi house...she taught mi 5 chapts of maths..tried to cramp everythin..n guess wad????????.......I SCREWED MY MATHS PAPER!!!!!!!!.....*cRiES*...aniwae..she came..frm sch..haha..hmm.she got a sunflower fer mi....fishes.....chocs....WHOAAAAAAAAaaaaaaa.......we also kinda exchanged phones la...she gave mi her 6610......WHHHHHHOOOOOOOAAAAAA...........first time..haha.....aniwae...had lots of fun man..talk so much rubbish..chasin rund the room.....n i tripped on mi blanket......*sObS*......landed on the floor on my kneee.....painful..............aniwae..she left mi house bout..9 plus...m,um sent her home......yea..she comin later again!!!....hahaha.......aniwae.......yest..wanted to slp....every1 called mi out...yea...went monks....met *jUStIN*....she said i cue..aniwae..i tinks she's cute too..aniwae...*SHE*......the last time one...ask mi this yest....."U REALLI LIKE MI ARH???"..HMMmmmm.nice one man...ya wanna flirt..no prob...wanna keep from mi..yea..i'd pretend tt i noe nothin bout u havin a gf..haha......she wanna play game....i'll play it too.......=).........sounds fun...danced with her yest...aniwae...dunno thid bung was touchin mi waist yest..funni..nvm....aniwae....*rOy* went...thot she no money.....i also la...aniwae..hmm.....i wonder when she's comin..maybe anitime soon..juz waitin fer mi doorbell to ring....yep...i was pretty much sian yest..was sittin outside monks...chattin....haha.....i tried it.....BAR TOP DANCIN.hahaaha................opps.........yea..was dancin on the bar top....so high~!!!!!!!........hee....*cLaY*.*CaL*..*kriS*.....all dancin with mi on top..k..she's here..tatazzzz



left her thoughts ♥ 12:38:00 PM

alrite...i realliiiii think i'm a computer IDerT!!!!arhHHHHh..i dunno nethin.....hmmz....aniwae..nvm....hAiZ..today..come home from school.....talked on the phone till 7 plus..wif *zion*....sia la....talk alot...we've been talkin quite alot...lucky mi hp is free incomin...or else mi bill will explode....hmm...i tink she's sweet..ok la...cant sae much bout her...dun realli noe her well...=)........she sent mi chocs..so sweet....arh!!!!...haha...by snail mail...den..got it today..weird..she said she posted it today....den i got it today.....HMMpZ....den the envelope get no stamp or wad..juz mi name n address..arh..so weird........*eYeS WiDe oPeN*..haha....k..i told her i dunno how to do maths.she offered to teach mi on thurs.....told her said she can come my house..but..dunno if mi mum allow...but....i need tuition..hmmmmm.....aniwae.we put down the phone coz she had tuition.....hmm....she plays the piano sooo well...ARHHhhhhh.......i noe i'm very bad at it...haiZ........*sNiFfZ*.....aniwae...wait tilll her tuition over...den she'll call mi......hmm..noe her fer 3 days..been talkin non-stop....she's funni..like mi....talks rubbush..like mi..hahahah.....den..i bring mi phone to sch....opps.......SHhhhHhhhh..dun tell neone....yea..den in class....sms her...she also sms mi...but today..she was at home..she din wanna go sch..haha...den talked to her fer the last 1/2 hour of sch before it ended...hhaa..was laughin in class coz she's sooo funny..hahahah....aniwae....cant study..no mood..arhhh..need to write her a letter..aahaaahhaha...made mi own envelope..haha....k la..i better go!!!..tataZ.......



left her thoughts ♥ 7:50:00 PM

arhhhHHHHHh.....EXAMZ COMIN!!!!!!!!ARHHHHHHHHhhhhhhh...i hafnt studied....arhhhhhhhhhhhh.....i'll come hone n talk on the phone with *zion*...arhhhhhhh................DIE!!!!!!!!..........nv sit down n study.......hmmmm...



left her thoughts ♥ 7:35:00 PM

k..i'm so bored.......been talkin to *zion* fer the past 2 dayS??..haha..she so farnieee...hahahah....aniwae..missed han han.....todae in art..without..so sianz..but joyce was siao today....crazy....hahaa....aniwae....went home.....talked to *zion*....most of the nite la...talk so much rubbish......ooooo......my mum's back gtg..tataz.....



left her thoughts ♥ 10:13:00 PM

k..listenin to this song....very meaninful.....n YOU...u noe who u r..juz read the lyrics....


This is the place when i sit,
This is the part where I love you the most..
This is as hard as it gets..
Coz i'm gettin tired of pretendin i'm tough..
I'm here if you want me I'm yours you can hold me..
I'm empty and dakin & tremblin & breakin...

(Chorus)
Coz you don't see me..
& you don't need me...
& you don't love me....
The way I wish you would..
The way I know you could..

I dream a world where you understand..
That i dream a million sleepless nites..
But I dream a fire when you're touchin my hands..
But it twisted into smoke when I turn on the lights..
As speechless & faded its too complicated....
coz this is how the book ends.
Nothin but GOOD FRIENDS...

(Chorus)

This is the Place in my heart.
This is the place where i'm fallin apart..
Isnt this juz where we met.
This is the last chance that i'll ever get..
I wish i was lonely instead of juz stoning..
Crystal & see thru & i'm noddin up to you..

(Chours) X2



left her thoughts ♥ 3:18:00 PM

kk....so cool......Grace came over mi house n Sean too....we studied..my GOSH!!!!!!..you should see how Sean reacted when he saw Grace......i was..err.....jealous??...so sad rite??......HIAz..i felt ZHi BEI.but nvm.....I StILl wAnNa Be SINGLE......den NO MORe HEART BRKS FEr MI!!!!!...haha..aniwae....guess Grace n Sean had a great time....haha..........so happy fer them...grace found her guy.......=)...........



left her thoughts ♥ 2:05:00 PM

alrite...i cried....i'm cryin now....i dunno fer wad....i read a blog.....n i started cryin...i wonder.wad haf i brought myself to...y am i like that??....i feel like total shit now....i realli feel like a TOTAL LOSER...a BITCH...a....wadeva u can call mi......i dunno!!!!!!!!!!! CHERYL IS A FUCKIN LOSERRRR!!!!!!!!!...everythin goes wrong fer mi..i brought it upon myself.....that proves that i am a LOSER!!!!!!.......URGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



left her thoughts ♥ 12:52:00 PM

ok..in sch again...mum said i spendin too much time on my blog....arh......cried myself to slp last nite....arh..dun bother...nvm.......i miss sum1...but..TOMOLO IS FRIDAEEEEEEEE............YEA!!!!!!!!!!!!!.........maybe perhaps she'll call mi.............ARh........nvm..i noe..she doesnt like mi..SHE DOES NOT.........i shant dream.......den again.everythin tt i've done..everythins tt happened..made mi realised...i am a les...i duno....i noe...*she*....my 1st.......asked mi before if there was another chance will i....it took mi by surprised..i mean...it made mi wonder fer a few days...k..tt was a long time ago......remember we had fun...fights together..but...tt was sec 2... when i saw tt she had the potential...to be a bung..told her tt...aniwae...she also gave mi a big heartbreak.....in town...cried in taka..coz i was so sad.........2 yrs haf passed.......many things happened....MANY....guess.i had lots of experience.....maybe???..i've been thru the worst.......so many things happen to mi...Good N bAD........the best..is gone..nv comin back....den agin..its all my fault...ITS ALWAYS MY FAULT...sumtimes....i sit down n wonder..wads the use of mi livin.......wads the use when everythin happened to mi...mi gone..makes no difference to the world.....i did..wanted to die...but..was stopped...i wld..again....but not gonna say when.......aniwae...sum1 asked mito be her gf yesterday..but i din say yes....i said no....gonna be single..dun wanna makke animore mistakes...but..if i find the gal of my dreams..or sum1 i like..which is *HER*..i wld...n i wont wanna brk with her..i wld be with her..n move out with her...maybe perhaps go overseas n get married....the last guy i wld ever like..is over..i'm not gonna try likin a guy...NEVER.........NOT ANYMORE..i did....i tried..but the more i tried..the more i'll start to dislike him...*east*..this is wad i'm feelin....i cant like u.........i tried.....but no one can replace him.......(not sayin i like him)..i dun..not animore.....but.yea.memories will still be there la..arh..wadeva...but..now..i'm writin...n *tears in my eyes*..i cant cry...not wastin my tears animore...i'm not wastin animore time...now...i hafta study..n..i tink of her...n den again...i shant dream..she wont like mi..i'm too bad....was tinkin of bein a bung...at least..i noe wad gals wan...i wont hurt them like guys do.....i will take care of them...i will love them...although i cant give them wad guys can..satisfaction...but..sum gals dun wan it...they onli wan security...sincerity.....love...i can provide them......but den again...its a thot....i'm still young....i guess..sooner or later..i'll tell my parents tt i wont marry..to a guy..tt i onli like gals...they haf to accept it.......its mi.....i'm attracted to gals....not to guys.not animore....alrite....if u wanna dispise mi...go ahead..condemn mi....maybe i shld be condemned to hell........for all tt i've done........i'm not a human........i'm a BITCH........wadeva.........maybe sum1 in disguise???..u may nv noe.......



left her thoughts ♥ 1:09:00 PM

k.here i am..again...i dunno..suddenli....i thot of sum1.....n i suddenli miss tt person....i noe i shldnt be miss tt sum1.....But i did.........haIZ...i realli wonder wad tt sum1 is doin.....haiZ.....i'm scared.......the feeling comes back again...den..my heart will hurt again..it is kinda hurtin now......i dunno y....NoooooOOOO CHERYL!!!...ya hafta be strong...........u hAF TO......haiz..i guess..i hafnt got over it yet..i dunno.......shit..i feel like cryin now........but.no one to comfort mi......n i dun wan....juz wanna cry mi eyes out...i better cry it all out..before i break down durin my examz like i did fer a test 1 mth ago..cried pretty badli halfway while doin it....coz..i was sooooo damn sad..i cant afford it......i cant.......hIAz......where's God.......



left her thoughts ♥ 10:05:00 PM

heyya..listenin to this song.nice......


Bring Me to Life


How can you see
into my eyes like open doors.
Leading you down into my core
Where I've become so numb.
Without a soul
My spirit's sleeping somewhere cold
Until you find it there and lead it back home.

(Wake me up)
Wake me up inside.
(I can't wake up.)
Wake me up inside.
(Save me.)
Call my name and save me from the dark.
(Wake me up.)
Bid my blood to run.
(I can't wake up.)
Before I come undone.
(Save me.)
Save me from the nothing I've become.

Now that I know what I'm without
You can't just leave me.
Breathe into me and make me real
Bring me to life.

[Chorus]

Bring me to life.
I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside.
Bring me to life.

Frozen inside without your touch,
Without your love, darling.
Only you are the life among the dead.

All of this sight
I can't believe I couldn't see
Kept in the dark
But you were there in front of me

I've been sleeping a 1000 years it seems.
I've got to open my eyes to everything.

Without a thought
Without a voice
Without a soul

Don't let me die here
There must be something wrong.
Bring me to life.

[Chorus]

Bring me to life.
I've been living a lie
There's nothing inside.

Bring me to life





left her thoughts ♥ 6:29:00 PM

k..in sch now..my gosh...i'm realli a pig.....been plannin to slp at 10 to 11.45pm den wake up to study...set so many alarm clocks...asked mi friends to wake mi up..k..the alarm clock rang...my friends called....n i cancelled their call...n guess wad??....I WENT bACK TO SLP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!...arhhhhhhhhhhh...........wad a PIG i am.....den..i nv get to study lor...well...nvm la..haha.....



left her thoughts ♥ 12:22:00 PM

Human beings are complicated by nature and I wouldn't deny that.
You wouldn't believe my profession. But I have a strong passion for what I do.
I'm not a great dancer but dancing its one of my only burning passion in life that keeps me going. =)

A petite girl who loves to socialise and have tons of fun!
I'm patient but don't try to test the limits.
Well,as long as you are not a weirdo,you're most welcomed to join my social circle.
*cheerios!!